Being Human

Have you ever been impressed by the simplistic profundity con­tained on a message inside a for­tune cookie? If the answer is yes, then you may be able to grapple with the over­whelming simple-mindedness of Being Human. This New Age tome by director Bill Forsyth (Local Hero and Housekeeping) manages to combine the philosophical range of Jonathan Livingston Seagull with the metaphysical savvy of Shirley MacLaine. If this sounds like the movies' equivalent of Yanni, think again. Being Human is nowhere near as complex (and, yes, I'm being sarcastic).

Robin Williams trudges through the centuries as an everyman named Hector. His family is stolen by marauders during the Bronze Age; he gets stuck with an incom­petent master during the Roman Empire; he goes wandering in search of his family in late medieval Europe; he's shipwrecked in the 16th century; and finally reconnects and reconciles with his kids in the 1990s.

This summary of Being Human doesn't do the film justice; it isn't nearly as interest­ing as I just made it sound. If the truth be told, I almost dozed off during the Roman era, which is a good indicator of how dull Being Human is — I normally don't nap until the Middle Ages.

At the end of the journey, one of Williams' kids tells him that this is as good as it gets. Too bad the little nipper didn't warn us of that at the beginning of the film — then I could have bolted down the hall to catch another movie.